my last post was on November 8th, 2012. wow.. 2 years had passed. i miss blogging so much . so many things had happened since the past 2 years . most of them was only bad experience which i don't think i would wanna share it here. but things are getting better now. i really do not know where to start or what should i say or share that would give benefit to anyone who's reading
have you ever thought that if one thing hadn't happened, a whole set of things never would've either?
sometimes i wish few things never would have happened. sometimes i wish i never did things i did. sometimes i wish i never met a certain people. some people would say things like "things happened for a reason" or "everything will be ok" or " u'll be fine" .. but the truth is nobody understand how u feel except yourself. nobody can heal you except yourself . telling others how you feel might help lessen the burden but at the end of the day you alone hold and carry the whole loads alone. understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery. i understand and i accept whatever that happened to me, but too bad, recovery wont take a day when the wound is too deep. the pain might go away soon but the scar will always be there and you will never forget how painful it was before the scar.
ive been working in a place that had the worst shift ever and i really can't wait to resign. Then i happened to know few people that really are a pain in the ass with the worst attitude. Next, got stuck in a relationship that was ridiculously complicated and undefined. so basically all i could say in my first post is that i am physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted. and i'm sory that you have to read this. (whoever that is reading) i'm sory if it's not constructive. i just had so much on and i feel like writing. above are my own self motivation in disguise of how destructive i felt right now.
the thing about pain, it demands to be felt -The fault in our stars